Saturday, June 14, 2008

Gnashing of teeth

I have just had the privilege of frittering away several minutes of my life on hold with the Borg that is Franklin's local phone company, Embarq. Now, aside from the sheer corniness of the new-fangled spelling (all aboard for 'whole-word' learning... you too can look like an idiot), the amount of time spent on hold (16 minutes), and the grating, tinny music they subjected me to, it was the utter lack of assistance I received when I finally got to "Tim" that has my blood pressure up.

I calmly explained what had happened when the lightning struck yesterday, and told him exactly what "computer" had told me... that the Internet connection was disabled due to a "socket failure". I asked if he thought a technician could come and check the wiring, and have a back-up modem ready to install, if that was what had fried.

Well, don't you know he had to 'run a diagnostic' first to tell me exactly what I told him, then asked me if I couldn't just go to "the Embarq store" (wherever the hell that is) and swap out the modem myself.
Oh, sure, cupcake. That's precisely why I pay the super-expensive BUSINESS phone rates on my bill, bought the back-up line insurance, and wasted twenty-three minutes of my life this morning with your horse-ass...
They're coming to fix it on Tuesday. "Tim" couldn't say for sure if the repair man would be equipped with a replacement modem or not. I almost can't take the anticipation.

eta: the Boris has again posted. This proves two things. 1.) He does sometimes pay attention when I tell him a humorous anecdote, and 2.) Drunk-dialing is always funny, though it can become someone's blog post title.


Rachelle said...

I feel your pain! I don't know what it is about phone companies.

I have this theory that in order to get hired as a "customer service" person, they put you in the room with ten quietly playing children and a box of sleeping puppies, and the only way you can get a job is by making every child cry. How many puppies you manage to kick decides what your supervisory level is.

Wow. I REALLY need a cup of coffee.

Thimbleanna said...

Oh darlin...don't EVEN get me started on Embarq...

Embarq_lamontl said...

Hello camillaknits,

This is a message from Lamont with Embarq Customer Support. I want apologize to you for your frustration with the hold times and the lack of support you experienced with Embarq. We try to resolve issues over the phone through troubleshooting to reduce your downtime. Certainly storm damage from lightning is an issue that does happen, and can cause DSL modems to get "fried" and need replacement. In the case of modem replacements, we will send those out with next day air priority so you can get back online as fast as possible. If that is too long of a time to wait, we give the customer the option of picking one up at a local Embarq store the same day, but it is certainly not a requirement of our customers to do so. Typically sending a technician out can take up to 24 hours or longer (2 business days in your case), and we want to be sure we are giving you, the customer, the best and fastest resolution possible. Sometimes, even when an issue seems obvious, we still want to be sure that your issue get resolved properly, in the fastest time possible, and fixed the first time so you can enjoy the service without having to call back for further assistance. In the situation of having a "socket" error, this is actually a software error within Windows that could be a relatively easy fix of just a few minutes by running some repair tools within Windows over the phone. Running the diagnostic tools that we do assists us in being sure we are providing the right resolution to you as a customer. I am glad that the issue is being resolved and will do all that is possible to resolve any other concerns you may have. Please reply to the following email address with your phone number and I will research when the technician was due to arrive. We strive for complete customer satisfaction and with your help we can improve our service. Thank you for using Embarq, your complete communications solution.

Lamont L.
Embarq Customer Support
For additional support please visit or call 1-877-646-3282
Voice | Data | Internet | Wireless | Entertainment

Annalea said...

I find it ironic that Embarq took the time to post a message at your blog, to try to smooth over the poor customer service, instead of either a) having good CS in the first place, or b) contacting you directly to take care of it. Hollow.